>As someone caught up in the spin-off, regretting the
>shallowness of my own meaning-making, I am grateful
>to Naoki, Eugene, [and now Luiz] for their contributions....
>
>Eugene, your (as usual) brilliantly multiperspectival
>analysis is one of the reasons I am grateful to
>be here.
>
>Judy
>
>At 12:50 PM 5/27/98 -0400, you wrote:
>>Hi John, Naoki, Luiz, Yrio and everybody--
>>
>>As a ten-year immigrant in US, I have been many times John's, Naoki's,
>>Luiz's, and Yrio's shoes and here is what I've learned so far.
>>
>>1) I called what happened as "a misunderstanding with adversarial spin-off."
>>2) There is no way to avoid them.
>>3) There is nobody's fault.
>>4) There is better way to handle it is better than it has been handle.
>>5) There is no other lesson or moral can be learned from that except this
>>lesson.
>>
>>John asks,
>>> Please, be so kind as to inform me of the etiquette I breached when I
>>> remarked on the advent of (admittedly, only US) Memorial Day.
>>
>>There is a break of etiquette in my view. But indeed a misunderstanding
>>with a potential adversarial spin-off was running through your posting (not
>>your fault -- it was a transpersonal process and event). Let try to give
>>you sense of how misunderstanding emerges.
>>
>>Imagine that you are getting though a public form the following message from
>>a person unknown to you. It starts with a quote from your message, then it
>>goes through what you may say misinterpretation of your message (which is OK
>>with you -- not the first time), you also disagree with the points the
>>message makes. By it suddenly ends with the sentence, "By the way, beware
>>of white rabbits, although they are cowards, they DO run fast!"
>>
>>I guess you may start thinking that either the author is completely crazy or
>>tries to offense you. The sentence has some peculiar "language game" (e.g.,
>>beware, rabbit, cowards, DO, fast) and has moralistic, command psychological
>>syntax (i.e., by the way, beware, although, DO).
>>
>>Let me show that without knowing what is Memorial Day is about in US (I've
>>learned myself about Memorial Day only on third year staying in the US) this
>>is how the ending of your message can be read, "Enjoy Memorial Day--but DO
>>remember, please!".
>>
>>Language game: I try to construct my perception of reading John's message
>>without knowing about Memorial Day. It sounds something like like that,
>>"Enjoy Death, but be serious."
>>
>>Psychological syntax of the message: "Enjoy... but DO" In my view, this is
>>syntax of command and didactic (consider a possible reply, "Who are you to
>>tell me what and how I should do?").
>>
>>All together, make the whole message offensive.
>>
>>I understand Luis saying, "By the way, Naoki, you have nothing to be sorry,"
>>because in my view, many people may feel to be offended in Naoki's place.
>>However, I think Naoki's apology for reading John's message as offensive
>>without actual author's offensive intent is very good one. It breaks the
>>cycle of misunderstanding and adversary.
>>
>>Another issue is that XMCA is dominantly an American forum. It is carried
>>on a American server, it is conducted in American English, American members
>>are the largest group on the list, American journals dominate many fields of
>>the participants, a lot of research money coming from US, US contexts
>>dominate XMCA, and so on. However, in my observation, XMCA forum has become
>>more diverse in many different dimensions (e.g., nationality, gender,
>>field). On one hand, I think the more diverse we are, the more
>>possibilities for misunderstanding. On the other hand, the more diverse we
>>are, the more tolerant and skillful we are in managing emerging
>>misunderstandings. A negative adversarial spin-off of misunderstandings is
>>silence in not only participants but in bystanders. It takes time to
>>recover. I think we learn to overcome it as soon as possible.
>>
>>What do you think?
>>
>>Eugene
>>
>>-------------
>>Eugene Matusov
>>Willard Hall#206G
>>Department of Educational Studies
>>University of Delaware
>>Newark, DE 19716
>>Office: 302-831-1266
>>Fax: 302-831-4445
>>email: ematusov who-is-at udel.edu
>>website: http://www.ematusov.com
>>-------------
>>
>>
>>
>
Judith Diamondstone (732) 932-7496 Ext. 352
Graduate School of Education
Rutgers, the State University of New Jersey
10 Seminary Place
New Brunswick, NJ 08901-1183