profound silliness.....

Gary Shank (shank who-is-at duq.edu)
Fri, 10 Sep 1999 15:17:14 +0300

on the other hand, here are two pieces of profound silliness to launch us
into the weeekend.....

gary shank
shank who-is-at duq.edu

1) i dont know who said this -- any clues?

"Education in the 20th century is like being taken to the world's
greatest restaurant and being fed the menu."

2) it has come to my attention that a cncentrated effort is afoot to merge and
mix qualitative and quantitative methods. this should not be attempted
without proper guidance. below is a set of conversions that might be
useful for such efforts....

Conversion factors:

1/1,000,000 phones = 1 microphone

1 trillion microphones = 1 million phones = 1 megaphone

2000 mockingbirds = two kilomockingbirds

10 cards = 1 decacards

1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche

453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake

1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin

10 rations = 1 decoration

100 rations = 1 C-ration

10 millipedes = 1 centipede

3 1/3 tridents = 10^1 dent = 1 decadent

2 monograms = 1 diagram

8 nickels = 2 paradigms

2 wharves = 1 paradox

2 noids = 1 paranoid +1 noid = adenoid

5 grams = 1 pentagram

100 ifiknows = 1 hectifiknow

10^-12 (one-trillionth) boo = 1 picoboo

(1 boo)^2 = 1 boo-boo

10^-18 boys = 1 attoboy

>1/10 mate = 1 decimate

1/10 Arnaz = 1 deciArnaz

10^-9 (one-billionth) goats = 1 nanogoat

2 gorics = 1 paregoric

0.001 ink machine = 1 millink machine

1 billion los = 1 gigalo

0.01 mental = 1 centimental

10^15 dogs = 1 petadog

10^18 lent = 1 exalent

10^-21 Marx = 1 zeptoMarx

10^21 spell = 1 zettaspell (take your shoes off)

10^72 = 10^24 ( 10^24 (10^24))) = yotto-yotto-yotto

10^100 purple dinosaurs = 1 barney google